Our brain can be our best friend and our worst enemy at the same time. It can protect us when something scary, traumatic or stressful happens, but it can also keep us up at night reliving those experiences, over thinking situations or causing us to doubt ourselves. How do we train it to be our friend and not our enemy in those times of stress or doubt? I am still learning that myself but one thing I have learned is that we can’t always control it. I hate that I have all these issues and thoughts in my head all of the time, however i am learning the more accept it the more I can learn from it. The way I look at is if I didn’t go through certain experiences I wouldn’t be the same person. Growing up we’re supposed to learn whats safe vs what’s dangerous. That becomes harder when the people that are supposed to teach us that are the ones hurting us and causing the danger. It makes it harder for our brain to distinguish safety and good vs danger and bad. If the danger is all our brain knows then we tend to push away or feel uncomfortable when the safety or stability does happen. We have to push through that uncomfortably and one day it won’t be uncomfortable it will be normal. It will be normal to feel happy and not sad, energized and not burnt out, positive and not negative. One of my all time favorite songs is called rescue by ash gale and part of the lyrics go “Cos I’ve been here for days I’m wasting away I don’t know which way is up Now it seems I’m outta luck”. Sometimes Getting out of that depression or anxiety cycle is a pain, and it can last for days at a time. People who don’t have it don’t get it, and they say just move on or your fine it’s all in your head. However when it’s happening the littlest things like taking a shower turn into an all day event. Getting through that is hard and it usually doesn’t start until we’re in a stable place to begin sorting through and figuring out where to go. The Aftermath of trauma is messy and complicated but once you get through that it becomes easier.